Bathtub: dedicated to Lim-Dul

There's a joke running around my playgroup saying that when one misbehaves and gives more attention to Magic than to the family the wife/girlfriend will force him to sleep on the bathtub.
This card serves those moments. It is utterly broken, we know, but it is a fitting punishment to all those who do it, starting an unwanted journey that will, sooner or later, allow them to find out their inner geek. If that happens they might get expelled from the forums because we don't allow geeks around here, ok???
Anyway, on with the card:

Bathtub 0
Artifact

Bathtub doesn't untap during the untap phase.
T: Turn on the faucet of cold water.

you just couldn't resist

Ya!!

You should do like thins.

T One Island: Turn cold water.
T One Mountain: Turn on hot chik.

Lim, the idea was yours.

Hey, MaJin, he already has a chick. I doubt she'd enjoy sending Lim to the bathtub for the night and end up with all the wild screaming... FROM THE COLD WATER!!!! You perverted minds!!!

ad another special abillity

RR: hot chic get's turned on enough to have "bathtub" become a Hottub jakuzi and cold watter into steam!!!

Yeah, yeah. The thing is that the red generated mana are two snow lands... Looks like you're in for a treat, all naked with all that snow. Brrrrrrrrrrrr!!!

Legendary Barrier Giant Hot Tub Jacuzzi c6


If Hot tub jacuzzi is in play when you play Giant Hot Tub Jacuzzi
Put 5 hot chick tokens in play with Banding.

Creatures can’t attack because of the steam.

0/5

So, you want an orgy...

I just want some fun.

Orgies are fun... Or so they say... Never been to one.

don't worry DarkRequiem, U are young,
many opportunities will come 4 U to travel to some greek island for example

That was a good one!!! But remember, the women that did it were british so anywhere there's a british gal, there's an opportunity.

This is the card's artwork: